Dan the man

I think dogs make the best pets. I’ve had about eight or ten dogs all of different breeds, mostly mutts because they seem to be the most loyal. I’ve had cats and I will say everything people say about cats living on their terms is correct, they own you not the other way around and you better keep that litter box clean or else there will be a surprise waiting for you when you get home. Having fish makes no sense to me, you’re going to spend money, a lot of money and for what? To watch them swim in the prison cell you call an aquarium? You can get the same exact thing on your smart TV without all the maintenance. My first wife liked exotic birds so we had two parrots not the little ones the big expensive ones that talk very well. And they live like eighty or ninety years, when we got them we had to get a big cage nearly six feet tall so it takes up a ton of room at first it was fun we would clip their wings and nails and teach them different words and we would leave the radio on for them. We had good intentions but they just never stopped talking, to quiet them they told us to put a blanket over the cage and they would think it’s nighttime and sleep well that was bullshit because they would panic and scream until you took the blanket off. So the last pet I had was a dog that my ex took with her and that was thirty plus years ago, it turns out I am okay just taking care of myself and honestly I won’t shit in your bed or maybe I will.